( May. 24th, 2009 10:55 pm)
I'm here, hunched over my books, so tired of studying that I don't know what to do. Even though it feels to me like I'm hiding my complete stressed-out-madness from the world, I have been told that this is not the case. So now I'll be hiding from the world until Tuesday. Wish me luck flist. I really need it!
Ever sit with a book full of sentences that are so dull that they lose all meaning to you?

*dying here*
( Jan. 20th, 2009 11:38 am)
I feel like every time I attempt to say that something is going well, something will happen to fuck it up. Today, that something is my brain. My brain has suddenly decided to stop wanting to help me get prepared for my meeting on Thursday. I know I can´t prepare tomorrow and that my only chance not to make a fool of myself is to go through a lot of background material today, but I can´t seem to focus. Instead, my brain is making all these attempts to not only get out of re-reading the Norwegian history of development aid, but it´s also attempting to get me to skip martial arts, telling me that it would be so much more comfy just to stay home. I can even skip my first lecture this year, it tells me.

Why, brain? What do you want from me?
I knew it would take me some time and I´m still not there, not quite up to my old reading speed, not ready to sit at school and study and not grown up enough to start doing the dull part of my self-picked curriculum, but I´m studying! A whole pot of warm tea and a f**king brilliant collection of articles on aid regimes in front of me, and only a short derail into lj. Student life might just be good after all.
( May. 11th, 2008 07:27 pm)
making a responsible choice for my future...

on a Friday night...

being a lawyer had better be awesome


Yeah, that's right. It's still warm outside. And I'm inside. Studying. There better be a job with a ton of money waiting for me in my future.

*going back into my source books*
( Jan. 16th, 2008 04:48 pm)
If so, you can join me. I have this feeling of accomplishment going today, which of course makes me feel like I don't have to do anything else. The sad thing is that it's based on almost nothing: I washed some clothes, paid my bills and picked up a package at the post office before going to the first lecture of the year. Then, I bought my curriculum and read one chapter. This is not nearly all I was supposed to do today and yet I feel like taking the rest of the day off and can't really seem to muster the energy to read chapter two in The Origins of the First World War. It could of course be that it's because I don't really want to read that book...I've never really been a fan of the first, second or cold war (she said, after signing up for the class), but I'm going to blame the fact that I actually slept 8 hours for once. I feel so rested and accomplished and not at all stressed out that I can't do anything. Does that seem right to you?

Oh, and if anybody is at Blindern now, have coffee with me? I have my cell phone on me at all times and will run from the study hall for some company!
( Jan. 14th, 2008 12:36 pm)
So, here I am, in an outfit I wouldn't be caught dead in, no make-up and my second cup of coffee clasped in my hand. That's right, the semester has started and I'm already working my ass off. Am I enjoying it, you ask. Well, on the one hand I already have the feelings of being overworked down pat: I feel like I'm being unsocial all the time, there's butterflies in my tummy even though nothing is going on, and I can almost feel my face wrinkling from squinting at the computer screen and reading the dull, dull stuff I'm reading right now. But on the other hand, though I'm doing something totally unrelated to my master's (working on the side), though the sheer amount of things I'm supposed to be doing every single day of the week is nearly driving me insane, I have to admit that it's a good way to keep from thinking too much. So the answer is yes, of course I'm enjoying it. I'm back to the way I've always been: overworked, underpaid and stressed out of my mind. It feels familiar.

(My 5 minutes of break is up, I'm getting back to work)
( Oct. 25th, 2007 02:18 am)
I realize that I might not come off as the type of person who loves lists. I'm messy, I like skipping class, I generally lose stuff, and I have a tendency to stay up way to late *stares guiltily at the time.* What I am not, however, is disorganized. That is why I like having lists. I finally decided to add to my organizer, my spare organizer at [livejournal.com profile] aj_stalin's house, my lists of menus and foods I can eat, my packing lists for trips and larps and my general half-year-plans; the great-all-encompassing-reading-list! Now, I know exactly what I am to read every day for the rest of the semester. And, suddenly, everything becomes clear. I read a little more than 100 pages a day, and I still feel up to doing other stuff, like spending 2.5hrs cleaning the apartment so I feel like that's in order too. Eivind scrubbed the bathroom, I scrubbed the kitchen and we washed all the floors and cleaned the living room. We are so good! And as well as getting things done, I feel like I know what's going on with the studying and everything. I should so have done this before now!

This icon is called "sirius black dungeon"
( Sep. 12th, 2007 05:27 pm)
I knew I was on my way home the moment I heard two Norwegians talking in Heathrow airport. They complained about the prizes of passports and how everything was too expensive in Norway. Then I got off the plane in Oslo, another couple complained about the state of the stairs. And finally, when I tried smiling to the security guards, brainwashed by the smiling American people, they frowned and looked extra closely at my luggage. And that's when I knew I was home.

Yes everybody, I'm back in the country.

Then, of course, my mom met me and hugged me and gave me dinner. The next day I came back to Oslo and got drunk and happy with [livejournal.com profile] aj_stalin and Eivind and today I'm trying to get into the whole studying thing and it's working halfway. So all in all, I'm happy to be home. But, you know, I wouldn't be Norwegian if I couldn't find a way to focus on the bad parts to justify my need to complain, would I?

This icon is called "lost", and it fits surprisingly well with how I feel at my university right now. But soon, my friends, I will remember how good it is to be here studying and will stop feeling out of place and disconnected, I'm sure (I hope...)




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