Do you know that feeling of shame mixed with pleasure you get when you satisfy an urge you know is wrong? I'm not talking about your secret pleasure for biting your nails, I mean that hardcore bad stuff like bestiality, scat or Chitty Chitty Bang Bang the musical? I imagine that people who have these urges but refuse to satisfy them for reasons unknown, might get dreams where they take part in their favorite vice and then get deeply shamed afterwards.

Speaking of, last night I had a dream that I was just going to throw away the leftovers of a giant chocolate cake (basically looking like the cake in Mathilda). I figured I'd just take a small bite of it, and then I couldn't stop and ate the whole thing. I felt immensely, almost sexually, satisfied before realizing that what I did had been wrong and I woke up with a feeling of deep shame and guilt. It took me about 5 minutes to figure out why I was feeling so bad.

From: [identity profile]

That's creepy..
Maybe you have a thing with food? Or weight concerns?

From: [identity profile]

Yeah, I do...I'm on a diet and it always makes me a little weird.

I'm not crazy yet though, just getting there...

From: [identity profile]

Not saying you are crazy..
We just dream of stuff that happen to us during the day

From: [identity profile]

Oh, I wish someone would give me a giant chocolate cake. I would so say fuck it both to my milk allergies and my diet! I'd be queasy as hell, but oh, so happy.

From: [identity profile]

That Cake is Amazing in that movie! I love that you write it Mathilda and not the Anglocised Matilda which looks less sexy!

HAHA! i was expecting so much worse with the introduction!

From: [identity profile]

I love build-ups ;)

Is it Mathilda or Matilda in the movie? I can't remember...

From: [identity profile]

It is Matilda! the boring Anglocised version.

i love it with an 'h'.

and yes, build ups are awesome. I was about to be like OH I TOTALLY AGREE WHEN YOU REALLY WANT SOMETHING THAT'S SO WRONG ETC ETC and then you go on and i'm like *ok, shuts up*

From: [identity profile]

I thought you were going to give us something really juicy now, and then it's just cake. Oh well.



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